Feeding Time Confessions of an Overwrought SAHM

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I really do love lists.  To do lists.  Grocery lists. You name it LISTS! It’s a type A person’s daydream. Oddly,  I have never written a list as a post for my blog.  But the other evening I was finishing up feeding little O in his high chair and I found myself picking up the dropped macaroni from his seat and putting them in my mouth.  I was eating the discarded droppings from my sons tray.  Was this a new low? How had I come to this? Rather than go four feet to the trash bin, I used my mouth as a human garbage can to avoid getting up and throwing it away.  I was beyond tired.  I was overwrought.  It was then I knew I had a list I had to share.  The following admissions are not for the squeamish or easily grossed out.  You have been warned.  Sometimes motherhood is just a dirty job.

10 Feeding Time Confessions Of An Overwrought Stay At Home Mom:

1.   I eat the puffs that fall on the floor from O’s highchair. Yup.  I do.   P.S. Puffs taste like nothing, but they seem like crack to Little O.

2.   If I’m not hungry, I sometimes pick up a puff from the floor and put it right back on O’s tray for his consumption.  Is that the five second rule? Or is it three seconds? Whatever it is, he doesn’t seem to mind.

3.   I eat the food that falls out of O’s mouth.  Yes, I use a wet wipe, but occasionally, I use my finger to get that glob of mashed up sweet potatoes and carrot purée off of his face.  It occasionally goes in my mouth.  Delicioso!

4.   I often (more often than not) accompany O’s dinner feeding with a glass of wine for myself.  I prefer a nice Cabernet with most puréed delicacies.

5.    I have ever worn the shirt I wore to bed the whole next day.  If my sleeves have baby food on them, I just roll them up.  Classy.

6.   If we have potato chips in the house, I will eat them in a mindless trance if O cries because he was just put down for a nap.  Its an SCM (snacking coping mechanism.). I try NOT to keep such trigger  snacks in the house.

7.   I feel guilty between 10-20 times a day for feeling like I’m not doing enough for my LO.

8.   I often have pee on my clothes and spit up in my hair.  Yes indeedy! I have a friend who says, “you are always so put together!”  It’s all smoke and mirrors, folks.

9.   I sometimes cry because I am so tired.

10.  I often cry because I am so happy.

 

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