Divided We Fall

 

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It is becoming abundantly clear that there is a significant division in American society.  Huh.  Not everyone thinks like I do.  What a revelation.  Ha.  I believe there has always been a certain amount of disagreement between folks.  The difference is, in today’s internet addicted world of 2016, we have social media to put those views on display.  Facebook, Twitter, and the likes are not often places for healthy debate, but rather, they are a forum to basically state your case, politicize (excuse me, express) yourself, or in some cases, bash, bully and taunt the opposition without having to actually face someone.  It has occurred to me that these forums are not helping us as a society, but polarizing us even more.  We are not listening to the other side.  We are not engaging in conversation.  We are posting and deleting.  Posting and de-friending.   But there is no discussion.  It is pretty one sided, on both sides.

I realized that I have a tendency to not read opposing articles.  I have, at times, erased people from my feed so as not to have to see their viewpoint.  I am wrong.  If I am to understand how we have gotten to this place of such discord, I must first understand where the opposition is coming from.  I can’t just assume that I know.  I must hear the other side’s story.  Because no matter who you are, we all have a story that informs our views.  It has just become so normal for us, as a people, to not have to listen.  We post.  We know how and why we feel the way we feel about the issues.  But what about someone who doesn’t think like me? How do they feel? And why? Everyone’s personal story is a window into those questions.  And I don’t mean the “story” we post for the world to see.  I’m talking about our real personal story.

What I don’t want to happen during this election cycle is to exacerbate the feelings of hate that are festering.  I have many many people whom I love who feel very much the way I do about most of the issues.  And I have dear dear loved ones who feel very differently.  I might not love their views, but I love the person.  Can’t we love the person regardless of their stance on guns or same sex marriage?  That was actually hard for me to write.  The point is, can’t we agree to disagree?  In the pre-Facebook era, we didn’t necessarily know what someone thought about the issues.  We could be blissfully ignorant of someone’s position and simply enjoy them.  Or at least tolerate them.  We aren’t only made up of the thoughts and feeling we have on the issues.  I would venture to say we have more in common than not as human beings.  Things like love of family.  The love of our children.  The sorrow of losing a loved one.  These are commonalities we share.  These are the real things in life.

I am certainly not saying I will turn a blind eye to racism, hate or bullying.  I will not.  There is no place for that in world I want to live in or raise my son in.  As I say to him, “that is unacceptable behavior.” When confronted with someone expressing those views, I will denounce them every time.  Face to face.  On that, I am firm and unmaliable.  I believe it is important to speak up when faced with or being witness to bullying, racism or hateful behavior.  That is an example I need to set for my son.  What I will do though, is listen more. I can try to understand more why someone feels so strongly about their right to own a gun.  Or I can try to understand what is motivating someone’s anti abortion stance.  We all have a right to our opinions and views on the issues.  That is a principle our nation was built on.  We can’t forget that just because our views might be different.  Being racist, hateful a bully or all the above,  is not a viewpoint, it is a failing in character.

I guess I need to have faith that the goodness in people will prevail.  I need to believe that hate won’t win.  I need to believe that the commonalities we share as people and countrymen will pull us through this divide.  I need to believe the world my son will grow up in will be more tolerant, more generous and filled with more brotherly love than the world we live in today.  I will try to make this my last politically charged post.  I will try.  Soapbox busted.  Peace out.

Until next time, keep fighting the good fight and remember, behind every great kid is a mom who,is pretty sure she is screwing it up.  Thanks for reading! Xo