P.S. I Can’t Do It All

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As if I needed to declare this.  As if I assumed you thought otherwise….Nope.  It is most official.  I CANNOT do it all.  There are some things better left to others….anyone else, to be frank.  I have experienced an epic fail today in my quest for home improvement/beautification.  It is an important lesson I have learned.  Me, drills and drywall don’t mix.  I should stay far far away from anything having to do with said drywall.  In my effort to surprise my husband by hanging a hand towel rack in our newly renovated master bath, I have created a bigger headache for him than having to install it in the first place.  I know he hates hanging things, especially towel racks, etc.  I thought, “how hard could it be?”  Well, apparently for me, it’s pretty freakin hard.  There is now a hole the size of a small coin and a drywall anchor that has pushed through the wall with the screw still attached….what a mess.  I have given up trying to rectify the situation, as every time I attempt, the problem (and hole) gets bigger.  Oye.

If there is one thing that really irks me, it’s when I can’t do something.  I’m now feeling like a total failure.  If I had potato chips I’d be chomping on the big bag trying to crunch out my frustrations.  Instead, I downed 2 Oreos.  So not the same.  As I begin to come to my senses and get over myself, I wipe the crumbs from my face and realize there is another lesson to be learned here beyond staying away from drills and drywall.

Perhaps we are not meant to be able to do everything.  If you think about it, isn’t that how the best partnerships are born? People who complement each other in their talents and skills.  Well, that’s my husband.  He’s the ying to my yang…or the yang to my ying…either way, you get what I’m saying.  We are so opposite in so many ways….but yet we are aligned perfectly when it comes to important things like love and family.

Maybe it’s ok that I don’t possess the strength and skills to use a power drill effectively.  Because he’s pretty great at it.  I think it’s good that I have patience for the tedious projects in the house (like painting the woodwork) because he doesn’t.  I have no doubt there is some woman out there who is able to put a drywall anchor and screw in just fine.  Power to her! It’s just not me.  So perhaps I’m blowing smoke up my own tush, trying to make myself feel better for my failure.   Maybe I’m the only woman on earth who can’t seem to handle this seemingly easy task.  Whatever the case may be, I like being the ying to his yang.  I like compromising.  I like meeting him half way.  I like knowing there are things he can do better than me.  And in turn, there are things I do better than him.  I like being part of a partnership.  I like keeping each other in line.  I like being accountable to someone else.  Who’d have thunk?

So there you have it.  My epic fail has evolved into a revelation of gratitude.  My craving for chips has passed.  Until next time, keep fighting the good fight and remember, behind every great kid is a mom who is pretty sure she is screwing it up.  Xo

Deck The Yard With Pots of Holly

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I don’t know about you, but I LOVE Christmastime.  I start listening to Christmas music in late October.  I shop mostly year round.  And after Thanksgiving I like to have decorations around the house so I can really enjoy them through the season.   I adore everything about this time of year.  As you know, I’ve been especially crafty this year.  Ever since we have moved into our new house, I fancy myself a sort of Martha Stewart meets Nigella meets Pioneer woman.  I’ve taken on some big projects in our home.  But the ones I have tackled for the holidays were all fun….and gave me much joy to accomplish.

I have shared my love of our yard.  But as the garden goes dormant, I was looking for something to fill my planter pots with that was festive and winter friendly.  Of course, Pinterest has some amazing planter ideas and how-tos.  I kind of melded several ideas together and came up with these…..

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I literally walked around the property and found four different kind of evergreens, holly, pine cones and branches.  We have woods behind our house that go on and on…so finding these gems was not a stretch.  I pulled out the autumn mums I had in the pots, put some foam blocks for live floral arrangements on top of the soil and started arranging.    I don’t know how they will hold up in the New England snow….but for now, they are nice.

The second project I just finished yesterday, is a wreath for the birds.  In Martha’s November issue there is a picture of a simple balsam wreath with attached orange halves and pine cones slathered in peanut butter and rolled in bird seed.  It is so simple, but so nice.  I got a thing of green floral wire to attach the oranges (I used clementines) and pine cones to the wreath.  I added a festive red bow and I wound up with a sweet holiday accent for my yard and a party for the birds.

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I’m loving all the creative things I can find to do for the holidays.  I’ve made gifts (though I can’t talk about them yet), pumpkin butters, fire starters, pine cone door hangers….hysterical.  I do wonder who the hell is in my body.  If you had told me 2 years ago that this would be me, I would have laughed and and thought YOU were crazy!

Also know, that not every project is a success.  I have many “misses.” Just ask my husband about my obsession with butternut squash.  Poor guy doesn’t need to see a butternut squash (or any squash for that matter) for a very long time.  Sometimes you succeed. Sometimes, not so much.  Either way, there is something really fufilling about creating something beautiful or something delicious.  Hmm…It’s a lot like motherhood.

Flying Solo

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I am sitting in the airport awaiting my flight to West Palm Beach. I am flying solo. That isn’t just a cute quip. I am actually by myself. No husband. No child. They are staying home, having a boys weekend, holding the fort down. I will be readying my house in Florida for my snowbird renter. A quick jaunt, but I’ll be away, nonetheless. I don’t know why I feel the need to give you the details of why I am going. Maybe I don’t want you to think I’m leaving my child for a wild girl’s get away or an “all about me” spa weekend. Although, I wouldn’t judge you if YOU went away for a little fun in the sun or some R&R. I’d probably be jealous. Ha. I know I’d be jealous.  Always digressing.

The reason I am sharing this with you, is because this is significant for me. It will be the first time I will spend a night (let alone two nights) away from my O. I have been with him everyday and every night since the day he was born. I understood that I would be away from him when I made these arrangements. At times, I even looked forward to the little “break.” But the moment I had to walk away from him was harder than I expected. I’m just being honest. I’d like to say I walked away with the wind in my hair and the smell of freedom calling me. But instead, I felt like I was leaving a chunk of my own heart in New England. Say it….”Get a life, Mary!” Well, for 18 months and 4 days, he has been our life. Perhaps I am more of a Mommy than I realized.

It’s funny, because I keep telling my husband that I am ready to leave O with Grammy and be whisked away to Puerto Rico or some un-named island in the Caribbean at a moment’s notice. He is the one that is skeptical of leaving O overnight anywhere. He feels he is too young still for that. I tell him I would have no problem leaving O in her quite capable hands for a little weekend (or more) holiday with my husband. But, now I wonder……is that the truth? Could I stand being away from him for that long? Well, I guess I will see how I do first with two nights.

It’s not like I am worried about O. I am sure he will be quite happy to have Daddy take over the reigns of his day. My beloved is MORE than capable. He is truly Daddy of the Year. He will be silly and say things like, “I don’t know where his clothes are.” Or, ” I don’t know what he eats for lunch!” But the truth is, he can take care of O just as well (or better) than I can. Yes, haters…my husband is amazing in all ways. Suck on that.

My trip has only begun and I am missing both my boys something fierce. Logically, I know it’s a quick and necessary trip. I’ll be home before I know it. I was telling my husband on the way to the airport, that it’s actually good for me to go away on my own. It’s important for me to re-visit my independence every now and then. I truly believe that. It was a huge part of who I was before O. And I’m sure it will be again, when he is a bit older. But the pang in my heart when I left them still shocked me. After a life of travel and adventures, home is where I want to be. It is who I am now. It is my happy place. And boy, do I feel lucky to say that.

Until next time, keep fighting the good fight, and remember, behind every great kid is a mom who is pretty sure she is screwing it up. Thanks for reading! Xo